49th Annual Oatmeal Festival · Bertram, Texas

Meet Oatie & the
Grits Guzzler

1978
Oatie’s been part of Bertram since the beginning
10:30 AM
Grande Parade start — where they appear
10:15 AM
Arrive by for the best photos
Every Year
The Guzzler always gets “arrested”

If you’re new to Bertram, there are two characters you’ll want to know before the Grande Parade rolls down Vaughan Street — because if you blink, you might miss them entirely.

Oatie and the Grits Guzzler have been part of the Oatmeal Festival’s story since 1978, and while they only make their appearance for a short window on festival morning, they’re two of the most talked-about traditions in town. Here’s what first-timers should know.

Two Characters, One Rivalry

Community Pride vs. Comic Mischief

The Hero

Oatie

A giant, good-natured oatmeal container who’s been the festival’s beloved mascot since day one. Oatie represents everything the Oatmeal Festival stands for — community, fun, and Bertram pride — and spreads smiles wherever he goes.

The Mischief-Maker

The Grits Guzzler

A festival prankster on a one-track mission: convincing everyone to “Eat Grits, not Oats!” Complete with dramatic dry-grits theatrics, the Guzzler is equal parts funny and full of himself — and every year, it catches up with him.

The Grits Guzzler being questioned by the Police Chief during the Oatmeal Festival Grande Parade
It never ends well for the Guzzler — the Police Chief is never far behind.

Here’s the twist: the Grits Guzzler always meets a playful “arrest” by the Police Chief during the Grande Parade — a bit of festival theater that’s become just as anticipated as the parade itself. The Guzzler always vows to return. And every year, he does.

One fun detail worth knowing: a different volunteer plays the Grits Guzzler each year, so the character’s look may change slightly — but the mischief never does. Half the fun for longtime festivalgoers is trying to guess who’s under the costume this time.

How the “Arrest” Goes Down, Step by Step
A play-by-play of the Grits Guzzler’s yearly comeuppance, straight from last year’s festival.
The Grits Guzzler moving through the crowd sprinkling grits during the Oatmeal Festival parade
Step 1
The Guzzler makes his rounds through the crowd, sprinkling grits wherever he goes.
The Grits Guzzler dancing and tossing grits during the parade
Step 2
He dances and tosses grits into the air, milking every second of the moment.
The Grits Guzzler offering the Police Chief grits during the Oatmeal Festival parade
Step 3
Bold move: he even offers the Police Chief a taste. This does not go over well.
The Police Chief apprehending the Grits Guzzler at the Oatmeal Festival parade
Step 4
Justice for oatmeal is served — the Guzzler is apprehended on the spot.

Where & When to Catch Them

Appearance Window
Only right before and during the Grande Parade
Parade Route
Vaughan Street · Panther Park → East Street
Arrive By
10:15 AM for the best photo opportunities with both characters
Why So Brief
Texas heat limits how long volunteers can safely be in costume
See the Full Festival Schedule
Parade times, activities, and everything happening on festival day.

Coming Next Week: Ready, Set, Run for Your Oats

The festival’s 3.3-mile fun run kicks off the whole day at 8:00 AM — here’s what to know whether you’re racing or just cheering from the curb.

Every character, every custom, every “arrest” — it’s all part of what makes Bertram’s Oatmeal Festival feel like a small town’s living scrapbook. Come early on September 26th, claim your spot on Vaughan Street, and see the tradition for yourself.

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